Sweet, huh? I also came very close to failing that class. ![]() When I was in high school, there was a girl I liked in calculus class, and every day I would buy a package of Starbursts and sit there in class and make her small paper boats, one by one during the course of 42 minutes. ![]() Is Twix an empirically better candy bar than, say, a Snickers? No, but I was always more excited to get a Twix in my bag at Halloween: They were slightly less common and the crunchy, crumbly texture mixed things up a bit. I also appreciate the fact that full-sized Twix are split into two bars, allowing you the self-delusion that you’re somehow not eating an entire candy bar. An unimpeachable choice, and very good trade value.Ĭaramel, cookies and chocolate are an unbeatable combination any way you slice it. Your kids will thank you for buying these (after they burst into tears when you tell them they can’t go trick-or-treating). We all like Butterfingers, and I think a big part of that has do with the fact that there isn’t too much chocolate - these candy bars are primarily the flaky, peanut-brittle-like interior with just the thinnest of outer coatings. Trade value on Kit Kats is decent, not exceptional. I could make the obvious cat connotation with the name - cats are a particularly Halloween-esque animal - but that’s pushing things. The best way to eat them, of course, is to peel each layer away with your teeth, one by one. The chocolate tastes a little sweeter the wafers are a little crispier. But around the Halloween season, they’re infused with special powers, as with hot dogs at a baseball game. I don’t love Kit Kats as a rule and find them to be slightly above-average candy bars. A full-sized cup might yield you a Snickers and a Kit Kat, four Dum Dums or a handful of lesser candy. (Have you ever had artisanal peanut butter cups? They just don’t do the trick.)Īdditionally, Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups have high trade value. The taste is good too - the grainy, slightly salty peanut butter in each cup comforts in a way normal peanut butter can’t. Combined with the crimped black paper nestling each individual cup, it’s the candy that truly exemplifies the holiday. 1 ranking has to do with the classic yellow-and-orange wrapper. Happy Halloween, friends, and eat up: If you think 2021 is going to be any better, I have a bridge to sell you!Īdmittedly, a lot of this candy’s No. Certain pieces are worth more than others. I’ve ranked candy before and I’ll likely do it again, but for this particular piece I’m changing up the metrics a bit: First, I’m judging by taste as well as what I’m calling Spirit of Halloween (SOH) - how much does the candy capture the je ne sais quoi of the season? Second, I’m judging by Halloween Trade Value (HTV): Everyone knows that a big part of trick-or-treating is swapping candy with your friends and siblings when the evening is over. It’s in that spirit that I present to you the totally unassailable, airtight and indisputable L.A. And while the youngsters won’t be trick-or-treating nearly as much this year (except possibly in Florida), there’s no reason why you can’t have a depressing neighborhood-wide Zoom call where the kids show off their costumes and then parents all Venmo each other money to safely buy candy from Walgreens. Halloween, like goodness, happiness and truth, is largely canceled this year, which I can only describe as a full-to-bursting septic tank that has been emptied in your living room, filled again with flesh-eating scorpions and then dumped into your mouth while you’re asleep.īut that doesn’t mean we can’t still have a little fun, right? Candy, the great equalizer, remains a comfort to all, even during the darkest timeline.
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